‘Enjoying life without anger and bitterness.’

Hi everyone,

I wonder if you ever felt angry, bitter, or just frustrated maybe… I have, on more than one occasion. As I continue to overcome these feelings whenever they rear their ugly heads in my life, I also want to share with you hoping to help increase your strength in this fight.

Upon the request of Defyingmentalillness I blogged a piece titled “Enjoying life without anger and bitterness.” (click) There is a way out of sadness, madness and so on… I hope that the path I found will inspire you to locate your own…

Love & Peace,

Monika 🙂


My past is a story of a tortured soul

Trapped in a jail with invisible doors

No way out and no way in –

Complete unawareness of being within

…In the heart of the greatest lie…

I was the most faithful friend of my greatest enemy

I was the lost coin

Looking for ways to be destroyed

Locked away. Locked in…


Believing religiously that I held the key

Surrounded by darkness from inside of me

I was a vampire, not even a leech –

so convinced I lived, convinced I was free

Chasing after shadows and fighting with winds

I just kept running around, like a chicken – beheaded one

Just running in circles, running in the darkness

Flipping my crippled wings in my utter madness

Admiring the image of my ugliness

Tripping against each stone on my way

In the dirtiest soil I kept washing my face

Not knowing why I kept running away –

Away from the world!

Away from myself!

Away from my fate!

Running after freedom, getting more in-caged!

I tried! …To break away from the spell of his darkness!

But was overwhelmed by fear and tangible sadness…

…After I experienced all deaths that were mine

He surrounded me with a silent shout singing:

‘Girl, for you my body has been drained of blood.

How many more times will I pass you by?

How many more crimes will you bring to life?

Recognize me – I am He… Acknowledge me now.’

My past is a story of a tortured soul

Trapped in a jail with invisible doors… 🙂

“Almighty Gut”


Ha! Back then, when she was young

He was… nowhere to be found…

Yet, he had the guts to show up right now!

 Something’s wrong with her. Why is she so glad?!


That young girl had not a chance to tell him her dreams

Yet, her dreams of today – he knows about these…


His nod adds more strength to her stretched out wings



Baba… was absent while

She searched for a man

To hold her young hand;



He was the very one

To give it away

On her wedding day 🙂


Today is the only day that one truly has

Right now is the moment which counts

Right here is the place where one truly is

Not was, or will be… It’s alright, Papi 🙂


The first chapters of our story

Are filled with blank pages, I know

But these chapters that we live in

Encourage my soul…


I appreciate your being

Here & now and there & then

It took guts to move beyond

That old, bad mistake.


I am glad that I can say

‘Happy Father’s Day!’,

To you, dad… I am glad…

Almighty Baba gave you an Almighty Gut 🙂



Baba: Father

Papi: daddy