If It’s Broke – Fix It: Poetry & Self-Publishing


Love, don't Fear - Book CoverYou may have noticed that I changed the title and the cover of my latest poetry collection. Ha… the book had only been out for a month… ‘Why did you do that?’ one could ask…

Well, that month was the driest month as far as my book sales, on Amazon, are concerned. Not only was this book not selling, but my first book “Do Lend Me Your Ears” took a significant hit too. While they might have been caused by a range of factors – those events were too time-correlated for me to ignore. So, I pulled the plug on “Poems about Love and Fear” ☹ And when I did – my first book sales spiked yet again. Boom! 😊 That was about 1,5 months ago…

After picking up the scattered pieces of my wounded ‘marketeer ego’ (not really), I’m back with a confession: I rushed the cover design and did not take enough time to consider the title. It was me…

I don’t write about Love and Fear as if they’re equal – they’re not… I write about Love overcoming fear, hence the new more appropriate title: “Love, Don’t Fear”.

About that cover… picturing a random couple kissing in the background of the red, red wine… I mean the red, red cover… One of my friends said that, at first sight, she thought she was looking at an erotic novel.👀 Well, the book’s about affairs of the heart, but there’s no direct sexual content in it. “Love, Don’t Fear” explores emotional battles and relationship lows. And then, the plot leads you to inspiring breakthroughs and solutions. That’s what you’ll find within its dramatic and captivating story-lines…

Change was needed, hence poems about love and fear are no more (though Google may not know that yet). The cover’s still passionately red, but the kissing couple is gone. The title no longer magnifies fear – it puts LOVE in its proper place… 

Food for thought: If there’s a book inside of you – don’t be scared to write it and share it. You are not a failure if you don’t succeed at your first attempt. It just means that your story will gain a backstory… Gather more information, get all the help you need and go do it again! Just do it better, this time around.

I’m super excited to introduce my new (old) book: “Love, Don’t Fear” to You. It is available on Amazon now.

Check it out. Pick it up. Be entertained and inspired to love – not fear…

All the Time & Everywhere – Poem


lost found searching

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You don’t just find Him in Love, although

Many people like to think you do…

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His Love & His Peace break through our Hate

You find Him in joys, but more in despairs

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You find Him in dry spells. You find Him in rain

You find Him at night and during the day

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He is all the time. God is everywhere…

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Yet, here is the most beautiful thing

About finding Him…

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When you cannot find – you can’t even search

Your heart is too tired and too weak to care

He will find you…

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Wherever you’re at…

In sadness, in pain,

In the storm, in the rain

He is there…

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All the time & everywhere.

Get Free & Stay There – Poem


put on some music

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There are fervent desires hunting for each soul

Don’t let them imprison you. Learn to let things go

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When it hurts to not have what you think you need

Release and defy it – let your mind “stay freed”

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Learn to wait and believe – learn to let it go

Find a happy medium. Take your time to grow

In the meantime,

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Relax… Hear the silence and dance…

Life need not be this complicated, and you only live once

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Free yourself… Don’t be hasty. Be grateful today

When the time is right things will come your way.

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Talking with a Mother – Short Story


Homeless MotherWhile they seat in their big houses, I’m wondering how to tell my children that we must move out of our tiny flat, and that I don’t know where we’re going to…

–    ‘Must we leave our friends? Must we change our school?’

They ask, and I feel like running away, but they have only me, so I have to stay.

I go to the powers that be and ask them for help. They don’t look in my eyes. They glance… Their head holds a PC inside, rather than a mind, never mind a human heart. They hand me a number to ring. And I do, so I can be lied to… I sense that their words might be far from the truth, so I start my own search online. The computer, seemingly a little more humane, tells me part of what’s to know. “You are on the waiting list – number 334. So, I go back to the ‘people’, and ask:

–      “Does this mean that you’ll help us move house?”

–     “No.” They say. “Don’t leave there – stay. When you’re on the streets – come back. Then, we’ll have a chat. There are many like you. You are not the only one.” Fine! I leave. “Next one, please!” I hear them yell. I feel like I’ll lose my mind if I stay. From now on, I’ll send letters or I’ll e-mail them.

I will work, at the same time, as hard as I can. Though, to rent a new small flat this job won’t provide. What else will I do? I will cry, sometimes. Not too much. I don’t want to drown… in tears. Then, I’ll work again just to pay the bills. I feel really tired – I’ve been lacking sleep… I can’t let them kill me though! I’m going to live! Yet, I bottle these fears and the pain. There’s a bottle of wine in my hand.

– “Why?” The interviewer asks.

– “Why wine? I’m cutting my chocolate down.”

– “No. Why bottle the pain? Why not talk to someone?” He smiles.

– “Oh…” She sighs.

Those who are comfortable want to stay comfortable. They say that they pray for me and my family while they seat in their big houses comfortably. Meanwhile, I wonder how to tell my children that we have to move, again… And, I cannot tell them where we’re going to… I don’t know… God knows. Oh… {She pauses} That’s right. He does. ‘Oh, thank you for listening’, she adds.

The interviewer smiles.

 “I will put this wine away. I’m going to pray.”

She gets up and goes… Where to? Well… God knows.

Happy Mother's Day

Dedicated to all mothers - especially those forced to persevere 
a lot more than others. You are amazing! Happy Mother's Day!

Mirage, Marriage, Memoir – Poem


Mirage
He looked good and had a lot
So, she entered the mirage
Only, she had failed to notice
Ugliness & lack, inside

Their mirage turned to a marriage
From hell – especially for her…
Technically, it was not a marriage
She was not the only girl

Damn! Had she known before
Man! Had she shut that door
Now, things are not as they were
And there’s another… inside of her

They remain together
Every day is deader
Well, at least for her
He just doesn’t care

She is black & blue,
Although born to the white race,
With red cigarette marks
All over her face…

‘She’s such a good girl’, they say
‘How?! She doesn’t smoke’, they ask
They don’t want to dig too deep,
She feels safe behind her mask…

Many years ago,
Mum & dad (without a dime)
Saw their ‘once upon a time’…

giphy (1)
Very quickly, in one voice,
They approved her choice
They knew she would share the good life
‘Yes, our girl’s a rich man’s wife!’

Only now,
There’s too much drama
For daddy and mama…
And,
They feel like she failed
Because money’s still scarce
They do get their share, but
they spend & they spend…

She is all alone, except…
There is Another inside of her

She is finally getting there
Tired of sweet little lies
Turned to big & bitter crimes
She is bound & very tired,
But she can pretend no more
Keeps on choking on his waves,
But she’s swimming to the shore

There’s a miracle there, for her
Husband doesn’t want divorce, but he doesn’t care
Technically, he is not her husband
Coz she’s not the only girl

Now, she knows…
A graveyard may look like a park
Until you see its grave stones…
Finally, she’s been hurt enough
He’s fractured enough of her bones

Mirage turned into a marriage
Is becoming a memoir…
He will need to find an ashtray
To extinguish his cigar.

Taken from my new book “Love, don’t Fear – Poetry Collection”

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Excuses for Loving You – Poem


Colourful I love You Pic

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I love you because when I told you to go

You said you would not and you didn’t budge

You are dark & sweet. You’re my favourite thing

Way ahead of chocolate – even chocolate fudge!

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I love when you look at me like a little boy

Who’s just been presented with his favorite toy

Stimulating my soul in untainted liberation 😊

I like how you do it. Mmm, such a sweet sensation.

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Many times, I wondered if our love was right

When our days were nights, and we saw no light…

Yet, after each storm He’s taken us through

I remember how much I love the essence of you.

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They thought I loved you because I loved drama,

And I had become what they call a baby mama.

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Some thought it was purely awe-inspiring sex

And I’d dread my future if you were my ex

…Looking at another girl like a little boy

Who’s just been presented with his favorite toy

Sad Face Dried Flowers

There may be a grain of truth 

In all the above…,

But those aren’t the main excuses 

For You being the One I love…

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The main reason why I hope to love you forever

Is bullheaded trust that God joined us together.

Even when I feel like we’re going under –

I believe we have no right to put us asunder.

My Life’s Long Enough – Poem


time-man trapped

When my time comes (to die)

I want to die with a smile

I want to die young (at heart)

As late in life as I can

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Throughout my days on this Earth

I want to share life & give

I want to live my life fully

And like I know why I live

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I want the people to say

That I was honest & fair

& that I loved from His heart

& that my life’s truly art

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When you say, ‘life is too short’

It just becomes my pet peeve

And when I hear you repeat it

My peace & joy seem to leave

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To me, it’s like hearing this:

Most High does not have a clue

He gives us big jobs to do

And yet, His days are too few

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Not me! My life is enough

To do what I’m made to do

It’s in the setting of goals, in love

And then, in following through

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Oh Yes, I have to agree

Life’s surely too short to fight

Too short to hold on to grudges,

Or to be dead while alive…

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Yet still, your words have the power

Power to add or abort

And by repeating this phrase so much

You might be cutting yours short

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I’d like to lock this advice

Within your heart & your mind,

But I’ve no PIN access code

Just PIN this life-giving quote

Stop fearing death (poem)

 

Everybody dies someday

“How?” is the question, not “When?”

To Live Well & to Die Well

Should be the goal here. Amen.

Happy New Year!!!